Date: Sat, 21 Nov 1998
Title: The Muses: Calliope
Category: Poem - H
Spoilers: All episodes
Archive: Yes, please.
Feedback: Yes! Please!
Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully are owned by Chris Carter,
1013 Productions, Fox Television Network, etc. They are
wonderfully brought to life by David Duchovny and Gillian
Anderson. I will make no profit from this, and neither will
Fox if they sue me, for I am poor and have nothing material
they can profit from.
Comments: Part of a nine-part anthology of stories and poems,
based on the Greek Muses and the artistic field each represents.
Calliope is epic poetry.
Summary: The X-Files in rhyme
Season the First
In the beginning, they both were so young
Mulder wore glasses 'n held onto his gun
Scully dropped her robe; afraid of attack
But Mulder could it was bites on her back
Soon Deep Throat appeared, an avuncular sort
"Keep your enemies closer," he said in retort
In tiny, small spaces we met Victor Eugene
Then wondered exactly what Ruby had seen.
The beast woman died, but her child still lives on
And Shadows show strength that comes from beyond
There's a sentient AI who just wouldn't play nice
And anatomical judgments deferred on the Ice.
Alien possession most felt wasted Space
But Max was a friend, not your standard nutcase
Teena and Cindy; Eve Seven and Eight
Please keep them all safely locked 'hind the gate
Festering Phoebe and Fox who fears Fire
Scully believes Luther isn't a liar
A familiar face shows in a different guise
Jack Willis dies - then lives - and then dies
Salamander hand, Barnett and Purdue
Then EBEs and Lone Gunmen too
Was Samuel Hartley a Miracle Man?
Did Spooky Fox find werewolves in the clan?
Did prehistoric bugs really make human cocoons?
Did you know escalators had underground rooms?
Skinner said 'Fox' and we all wondered why
And CSM smoked and caught people's eye
Charlie Morris was killed and Michelle seemed to lurk
Roland helped finish his brother's work
Deep Throat was murdered; we saw alien goo
And then we were ready for Season Two
Season the Second
In Puerto Rico, Mulder saw the ET
DK saved his butt; he found faith to believe
Was Skinner a friend leaking help and a case
When our favorite Flukie led a quite merry chase?
LED displays make phobias grow
Another experiment? We'll never know
Tiny red speedos and Krycek and X
Sleep clinics and killing - it all connects
Then Duane Barry suffered and brought Mulder pain
Scully was missing - things just weren't the same
Matheson was helpless; X just wouldn't do
Krycek betrayed him, but Skinner was true
Did Mulder get friendly with Kristen Kilar
Before Scully came back for One Breath from afar?
When confronted by spores Scully didn't give in
Then she let Mulder wipe barbecue sauce from her chin
A nurse who was hurt when an old man kissed her
Led to three generations who didn't like sister
Irresistible Donnie who poached the girls' graves
The Devil was called and just would not behave
Voodoo and zombies and other Fresh Bones
Bounty hunters, green goo, and Colony clones
Samantha's not real and Mulder pursued
Unofficial channels are what Skinner used
Sophie's afraid, Willa can't keep her cage
Weird water on Ardent makes our heroes age
The Blockhead, Conundrum, Lenny and Lanny
The look of the future is Mulder - uncanny!
Calusari fight Evil;it knows Mulder's name
A virus, a prison, who's where in the game?
Soft Light, dark matter, and X in the end
Mulder's dad's dead and there's Krycek again
Mulder fights Skinner and then Scully shoots him
They drive to the desert and Albert's tale suits him
Aliens in boxcars; Mulder dies we suspect
A long summer hiatus before Season the Next.
Season the Third
Mulder survives and Melissa gets shot
Scully holds Skinner at gunpoint - for what?
Krycek's involved and the tape gets passed
Skinner tells CSM "Pucker up - kiss my ass."
Lightning and video games - our boy DPO
Clyde warns Mulder of a sad way to go
Neech is unhappy - he's killing The List
A quick weight loss diet - by 2Shy be kissed
Revenge is a horror when legless men Walk
And Lucy feels Amy - she just hates to talk
Alien autopsies - $29.95
Mulder jumps on the train - cell phone gone - he survives
Scully's implant's removed; she gives Mulder the code
Still X saves the day, though Mulder's a load
Scully believes and Mulder has doubts
Faith meant to survive - within and without
"What are you wearing?" and "Bambi's her name?"
Mulder tells Scully she smells bad - for shame!
"Sure. Fine. Whatever." And astral alignment
Smoking and drinking - unpleasant assignment
Grotesque gargoyles and Patterson's profile
Embattled Mulder was lost for a short while
Skinner is shot during Piper Maru
Krycek returns and oiliens debut
Well-Manicured Man and the Elder are here
All ends in the silo - with Krycek in fear
Cerulean blue from the Pusher Modell
A touch on the hand saves Mulder from hell
The Amaru urn, yaje, and rats
And Scully's attacked by some mean kitty cats
Hell Money won't buy off Chinese angry ghosts
Organs are sold and Chao ends as a roast
Jose Chung and Lord Kinbote, lies being spread
Diana and Reynard - then Mulder in bed!
Skinner is married - who'd ever have thought it?
Mourn for poor Queequeg - saw Big Blue and bought it
Subliminal TV and Scully's affected
But Mulder is color blind and finds he's protected
Ma Mulder, CSM, the healer and more
We're all waiting anxiously for next season -- Four!
Season the Fourth
Everything dies; so we're led to believe
And when X is killed we all want to grieve
A baby is found and Mom's under the bed
But Andy and Barney both end up dead
Deceive and Inveigle and Obfuscate
Melanin gland - Teliko; they relate
Pictures before times; unrest, Unruhe
All drank the poison, all had to obey
Elective surgery does not go well
And poor Raul's Musings just won't sell
Away in a Gulag the oiliens attack
Mulder regrets bringing Krycek back
Mulder is missing and Scully's in jail
Attempts to show evidence once again fail
A killer named Roche and little girl's hearts
A hug in the end before Scully departs
An alien, a demon, or merely a fungus
El Chupacabra sure worked to confuse us
Leonard Betts lives and Scully has cancer
But tattoos and strange men just aren't the answer
Scully tells Mulder she's going to die
He won't believe it; a hug and a sigh
Hate speech and murder, and Isaac arises
The invisible man offers many surprises
Poor Max is back and then dies on the plane
Pendrell is killed; the Dark Man is to blame
A man from the future returns to the past
The Kiss almost happens, but Mulder's too fast
For one man to win, another must lose
Murder, and bees; the AD pays his dues
Foretelling of death by a ghostly vision
Scully won't tell Mulder; a poor decision
Holes in his head; a powerful drug
Scully saves Mulder and heals with a hug
Mulder is dead? Or could he be alive?
With bated breath, we all want Season Five
Season the Fifth
Mulder's alive, but Scully is dying
Skinner's a friend and Blevins in lying
There's prayer and there's drugs for Scully's condition
But was it the chip that caused her remission?
We meet the Gunmen; they're weird but they're caring
And is that a ring our boy Mulder is wearing???
A Detour in Florida - give teamwork a chance
A monster, a bad guy, a dream? And a dance
A trip to the west coast and Scully's a mother
Emily dies, but could there be others?
Pusher is back - and his sister, too
Mulder shoots Scully, but it wasn't true
Trees that attack when there's nowhere to run
An evil doll that just likes to have fun
Mulder is captured by a living AI
Scully kicks ass, then rescues our guy
Vampires and buck teeth, and differing views
It's Resist or Serve and we can't chance to lose
Spender arrives - real trouble to come
And CSM lives - just can't kill that one
There's Mulder's father and a young Agent Dales
Marty sees murder and ends up in jail
Scully sees angels; Mulder will not believe
A gun to the head but then, a reprieve
Has Mulder lost it when madness is shared?
Then Scully believes, but we all knew she cared
A fire destroys all when it comes to The End
And we all must wait till next season again.