Title: The Skinner Journals: Sleepless Author: Daydreamer Author E-mail: Daydream59@aol.com Rating: R Category: V Spoilers: none Keywords: Skinnerfic, M/Sc/Sk friendship Archive: Yes, please. Feedback: Yes! Please! Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully, and Skinner are owned by Chris Carter, 1013 Productions, Fox Television Network, etc. They are wonderfully brought to life by David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson, and Mitch Pileggi. I will make no profit from this, and neither will Fox if they sue me, for I am poor and have nothing material they can profit from. Comments: Check out my web page, Daydreamer's Den http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Dunes/2113 The Skinner Journals: Sleepless July 22, 1994 Mulder came to me again today. He had a lead on a case he wanted to look into. He's still on wiretap surveillance, and every time I think of that brilliant mind spending hours just listening to the bullshit he's listening to, I shudder. I hate it. I also hate the fact that the man continues to lie to me. I mean, does he really think I don't know he was in Pennsylvania earlier this week, when he was ostensibly home sick? He liaised with another governmental agency, for crissakes. Did he think that wouldn't get back to me? Did he think I wouldn't hear he'd been dosed in the middle of the night with some kind of chemical spray and had Scully fly up there -- at his expense, I hasten to add -- to check him out? I wanted to shake him and tell him he needs to *talk* to me about this stuff before he pulls these stunts. I mean, from what the medical report says, he's fine. But that's no guarantee he will be next time. He can't keep going off on his own -- it's too dangerous. And until I can do something about reinstating the X-Files, I'm putting an end to it. The case he came to see me over had already crossed my desk. I didn't tell him that -- I was still too ticked off over his little jaunt to PA -- but I figured that if he was so damned insistent that he get out in the field, at least I could send him *with* someone, and not alone. Alex Krycek. Young kid, fairly fresh from the Academy. He could use some seasoning and Mulder could use some backup. I figure it would be a good plan -- pair the two of them up and let them go see what's going on with these fires that aren't fires. Didn't tell Mulder any of that when he was in my office, and man, what I would have given to have seen his face when Krycek showed him the 302. July 25, 1994 Well, that was a crappy weekend. I went home on time for a change on Friday. Only I ended up going home to an empty house. I'd made plans for the weekend -- atonement plans, I guess you'd call them. I've been neglecting Sharon too much, and I know I need to do something about it. So I'd planned a weekend away, just the two of us. A nice quiet bed and breakfast in the Virginia mountains. I had figured I'd get home at a decent hour Friday, surprise her, and we'd drive out. But, she was gone when I got home. Left me a note telling me she was spending the weekend with friends. I spent the weekend with my old friend Jack -- Jack Daniels. And now I have the headache to prove it. I sincerely hope Sharon is home tonight -- I need to figure out how to tell her what I'd planned for the weekend without making it seem like I'm laying a guilt trip on her. Or maybe I should just let it go and try again -- only this time I'll let her in on the planning. July 28, 1994 Mulder's report on the Augustus Cole case sits on my desk and, as is so often the case with his reports, I don't know what to make of it. Military experimentation with sleep deprivation? No -- sleep *eradication.* I know from experience that sustained wakefulness dulls fear and heightens aggression. It also dulls reaction time and decision-making ability. I find it hard to believe that our government would have gone down this road in search of a better soldier. And, as usual, Mulder reports that his supporting documentation is, ah, lost. Stolen. Taken from him to remove any possibility of proof for his allegations. I don't know. I mean, the man is definitely paranoid, but being paranoid doesn't necessarily mean someone isn't out to get you. With all that's happened to him, a little paranoia is not only understandable, it's expected. But this report doesn't give me a lot to go on. Mulder says that the trigger for all of Cole's recent spate of aggression was the anniversary of the Phu Bai massacre. That was 1970. I didn't make it in-country until '71, but Phu Bai and My Lai were both hot topics. It was brutal. If Cole was involved in Phu Bai, I can see how he'd say he hasn't slept in 24 years. Hell, I still have sleepless nights from what I saw and did in 'Nam -- no reason to think I'm the only one. The new kid is up for a review for firing his weapon. I thought I was doing the right thing in pairing these two up, but I'm not so sure now. Krycek swears Cole was holding a gun on Mulder, but there was no gun found at the scene. Mulder didn't see a gun either, but he supports Krycek. Says Cole could make people see things that weren't really there. The Review Board is going to buy *that,* I'm sure. But the kid is tough. He'll make it. I sense he may have a protector, maybe like Mulder has the Senator. If he does, there's no doubt he'll come through the Board with no problems. And if he doesn't, well, he was convincing enough when he talked to me. I can accept that he thought he saw a gun. Thought his partner was in danger. And since the one thing Mulder *did* manage to prove was that Cole was the killer -- another notch toward maintaining his solve rate ratio -- I feel pretty confident the shoot will be ruled a good one. I'm tired today -- tired and a little hung over. Too many sleepless nights of my own. Sleepless nights over Vietnam. Sleepless nights over the X-Files and Mulder and Scully. Sleepless nights over my marriage and Sharon. And when I do sleep? I'm still sleeping alone.